A story, a day

Hello there, welcome to my humble blog and digital journal,

I am an artist and mom of two amazing little kiddos, 5 and 3 years old.  Since as long as I can remember, journaling and writing has always been a hobby, a joyous activity, a source of relaxing and winding down for me, a way of understanding the world and myself. Writing letters, journals, diaries. Even in middle and high school, my favorite homework has always been writing composition, in university I really enjoyed doing essays and research. Throughout my journey till this day I have always kept a diary and a blog. after becoming a mom, I struggled a bit with sharing my stories and days on my main social platforms and blog it was a place that portrays my identity as an artist, having a career there online with my art. And as my kids are getting older, I am feeling the need to separate my personal life with my kids away from the professional artist life I lead there. Through our the last 5 years my days where not that much art focused as before, with my two kids and many many changes that happened along the way. In five years, I mainly shared as much as I need, in my journals of course I did, but there is something still so comforting to me to put the words and feeling and emotions out there on the internet, or a letter, or magazine for that matter for other people to read. so this is the birth story behind this blog here. 

I have been going through a hard time recently, with moving house, and the feeling of loneliness and helplessness and missing hometown. the pile of responsibilities clashing with the pile of creative ideas in my mind. my soul is on fire for all the projects and words and paintings I need to express, the feeling of not belonging to anything stable, I had the need to share and write and open myself as a way of coping. because when I think about it, I have a very simple life,  a very precious life. I wouldn't want to change anything about it even if I could. I am in love with everything around me, deeply grateful and in love. somedays I am unable to cope because of loneliness and the feeling of being so disconnected from everyone, other than my little kids.  I need to connect, because at the end, we are living together here, living together with others sharing similar stories and situation and emotions, living dreams and reality that is just as big and as hard and as enchanting. hardships and blissing, living together. 

Nowadays, I am solo parenting since my husband is out of town for another week. the moment he is gone I am missing him, and myself. and the four of us being together. I love my kids more than anything, but I sometimes just need a moment to myself. today the first day of solo parenting. It was nice, I was a bit tired though. I put my little kids to bed just now and jumped on the couch with my big glasses and laptop ignoring the dishes in the sink, the pile and pile of clothes needed to be fold, the shower calling me, because I just need to write. here and now, to recharge and it feels just right. 

My son woke me up early today, we drew a little, I made my coffee then my little girl work up. they played and I went ahead and preyed a little,  cleaned the dishes from the night before and then made breakfast for the three of us, granola with coconut yogurt and scrumbled eggs. second cup of coffee now, we read few books as we are having breakfast on the floor, pretending that we are in a picnic in the woods. 

later in the days we unpacked some more boxes, rearrange the bookshelves,  we recently moved but it started to feel homey now, everything is slowly taking its place. I started working on repainting few pieces of furniture as it was screen time for the kids.

few hours passed we cuddled and played and fought and had lunch and changed to go out on a walk and the park. three hours spent in the park then we head back home for dinner time, we had milkshake and leftover chicken that made a tasty chicken and pickle club sandwiches. we phoned my sister as we had dinner, then played little till bedtime. 

that was our simple day, long long simple day. if you made it till here, thank you! I hope you enjoyed it. this is our simple day, our simple life. living together.